Monday, August 12, 2013

#BlogElul 6: Do

What do you do when your brain won’t let you do what you need to do?

There are things that I have to do today.  I woke up this morning determined to do things.  I was out the door before 9 to start doing all those things that I needed to get done.  Up to the college campus to see if I could talk to the department chair about teaching in the Fall.  Back down the hill to my mom’s house to help her as she is laid up after her foot surgery.  Then I would be able to get signs up for tutoring to see about getting private students.  Stop at the store and do the shopping while putting up signs and then home to work on my Babka

Just walking out the door I could feel the anxiety building up in me.  It’s hard to describe what a full blown anxiety attack is like.  I have often tried, and the best I have come up with is it’s a lot like what I understand a migraine headache is like, but in the brain rather the physical headache pain.  Every new sound, every new thought, every new sensory input makes me feel more and more flustered and frustrated.


There are times when we want to do it all, we have out lists ready of all the things that we want/need to get done.  But that may not be what is needed of us that day.  I still feel the anxiety in me right now, but I know that right now I need to slow down and not try to do too much.

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